Some details on {K}'s name
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Daniel al-Autistiqui - 26 Oct 2006 17:36 GMT If my caretaker {K} had told me at the very beginning something like, "My name is K -- just the *letter* K, that is", I suppose that before long I probably would have gotten used to the fact that she had a one-letter name. I really, really, really wish she had said this to me when she first met me. I have always perceived "Kay" to be a name in its own right, unrelated to the alphabet letter except in pronunciation. "K" suggests an initial, or at least something shorter than a full name; "Kay" does not. If you still don't get my point, at least try to answer this for me: Why do people constantly question her name, *including* when they see it on *legal* *documents*? Would they also question a spelling like "Danyull"?
Now, whenever I need to write {K}'s name, I feel like I should surround it by curly braces or some other type of delimiter. An unadorned "K" does not look all that great when it appears as part of a sentence. Perhaps if a period was placed after the "K" as if it were an initial, it would not be that bad: but I've heard her say that "K." is wrong.
The worst capital letter to use as a personal name, it seems, would be the "I". That name would be extremely easy to confuse with the pronoun ("I was", "I will", etc.), although there are a few phrases that would be unambiguous ("I is", as opposed to "I am"). Even when the single-letter name in question is not "I", a sentence along the lines of "K and I did this", which could almost suggest that both the "K" and the "I" are personal names, would be possible. I have heard this, and because it looks so awful in writing, it does not exactly "sound" very good, either.
daniel mcgrath
 Signature Daniel Gerard McGrath, a/k/a "Govende": for e-mail replace "invalid" with "com"
Developmentally disabled; has Autism (Pervasive Developmental Disorder), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, & periodic bouts of depression. [This signature is under construction.]
Frank ess - 26 Oct 2006 18:48 GMT > If my caretaker {K} had told me at the very beginning something > like, [quoted text clipped - 37 lines] > > daniel mcgrath 'K
 Signature Frank ess
R H Draney - 26 Oct 2006 19:07 GMT Daniel al-Autistiqui filted:
>The worst capital letter to use as a personal name, it seems, would be >the "I". That name would be extremely easy to confuse with the >pronoun ("I was", "I will", etc.), although there are a few phrases >that would be unambiguous ("I is", as opposed to "I am"). There are personal names homophonous with the names of single letters; BJ Hunnicutt on "M*A*S*H" said he was named for his parents, "Bea" and "Kay"...I happen to have one such name myself, in the middle position, and it in particular can lead to some confusing exchanges:
Howard: "First, there was this trouble between me and Hugh." Judge: "You and me?" Howard: "No, not you. Hugh." Hugh: "I am Hugh." Judge: "You are me?" Hugh: "No, I am Hugh." Judge: "Stop saying that!" [to bailiff] "Make him stop saying that!"
From the 1972 Peter Bogdanovich movie "What's Up, Doc?"...r
 Signature "Keep your eye on the Bishop. I want to know when he makes his move", said the Inspector, obliquely.
Evan Kirshenbaum - 27 Oct 2006 19:19 GMT > Daniel al-Autistiqui filted: >> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > letters; BJ Hunnicutt on "M*A*S*H" said he was named for his > parents, "Bea" and "Kay" And here I thought he said that his dad's name was "Jay".
> ...I happen to have one such name myself, in the middle position, > and it in particular can lead to some confusing exchanges: [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > From the 1972 Peter Bogdanovich movie "What's Up, Doc?"...r You beat me to the punch on that one.
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R H Draney - 28 Oct 2006 01:40 GMT Evan Kirshenbaum filted:
>> There are personal names homophonous with the names of single >> letters; BJ Hunnicutt on "M*A*S*H" said he was named for his >> parents, "Bea" and "Kay" > >And here I thought he said that his dad's name was "Jay". Excuse number one: He had an accent.
Excuse number two: Like a damn fool, I believed the closed captioning.
Excuse number three: These keys are too close together for my fat fingers.
Excuse number four: My dog ate my homework.
....r
 Signature "Keep your eye on the Bishop. I want to know when he makes his move", said the Inspector, obliquely.
Solo Thesailor - 28 Oct 2006 02:29 GMT > .... > Howard: "First, there was this trouble between me and Hugh." [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > Judge: "You are me?" > .... Don't you pronounce the 'H' in 'Hugh? Or the 'h' in 'huge'? What about 'to hew something with an axe'?
 Signature Solo Thesailor http://sailingstoriesandtips.blogspot.com
R H Draney - 28 Oct 2006 05:44 GMT Solo Thesailor filted:
>> .... >> Howard: "First, there was this trouble between me and Hugh." [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] >Don't you pronounce the 'H' in 'Hugh? Or the 'h' in 'huge'? >What about 'to hew something with an axe'? I do...some people don't...Kenneth Mars's character in this film had a vaguely eastern-European accent and did not....r
 Signature "Keep your eye on the Bishop. I want to know when he makes his move", said the Inspector, obliquely.
Solo Thesailor - 28 Oct 2006 02:59 GMT > If my caretaker {K} had told me at the very beginning something like, > "My name is K -- just the *letter* K, that is", .... > .....Why do people constantly question her > name, *including* when they see it on *legal* *documents*? Would they > also question a spelling like "Danyull"? To answer your questions: People do generalise (it has to be that way, for survival you need to generalise what might possibly eat you). When they use that generalisation inappropriately or indiscriminately on an individual it can cause problem, or at least annoyance. 'Kay' and 'Daniel' are _generally_ spelt that way so these would not normally get questioned.
When you (or your parents) choose to do something out of the ordinary you need to be aware and accept the consequence of that action, without self blame either. I know that very well because I have done and am still doing a lot of things that are out of the ordinary, and I prefer it that way despite the repeated annoyance I have to go through. :-(
You can reduce that annoyance by adjusting your viewpoint and attitude. For example, in this case, K could remain proud of her name's uniqueness and interpret the questioning as well intentioned -those questioners are trying to be respectful of how (you or K spell the name. Of course there are those uncivilised or uncultured or uninitiated who would make a joke or a criticism out of it; oh well the jungle does have poisonous snakes....
BTW, using initials as names seem to be rather American?
In life I often reflect on situations that 'this is not about them, it is about me' - it is about how I handle it and how I do things that are consistent with my values and who I choose to be. My checklist (when I remember to or need to use it) includes: Am I acting with 'good will'?, Am I acting from the basis of compassion, kindness, and love or is it selfishness or attachment or delusion? Am I acting graciously? And, would lightening up and humour help here?
You have often posted very interesting questions or observations. Good on you, Daniel.
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Daniel al-Autistiqui - 30 Oct 2006 19:27 GMT >> If my caretaker {K} had told me at the very beginning something like, >> "My name is K -- just the *letter* K, that is", .... [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] >'Daniel' are _generally_ spelt that way so these would not normally get >questioned. So why do you suppose it sometimes takes a long time for people to be convinced that her name is "K" and not "Kay"?
Would you think that things might go any easier if she said, when first introducing herself to people, "My name is K, that's just with a K"?
daniel mcgrath
 Signature Daniel Gerard McGrath, a/k/a "Govende": for e-mail replace "invalid" with "com"
Developmentally disabled; has Autism (Pervasive Developmental Disorder), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, & periodic bouts of depression. [This signature is under construction.]
Skitt - 30 Oct 2006 20:09 GMT > So why do you suppose it sometimes takes a long time for people to be > convinced that her name is "K" and not "Kay"? > > Would you think that things might go any easier if she said, when > first introducing herself to people, "My name is K, that's just with a > K"? No, that would not help. The proper thing to say might be, "My name is K -- just the letter K."
 Signature Skitt (in Hayward, California) http://www.geocities.com/opus731/
Gene Wirchenko - 31 Oct 2006 21:02 GMT [snip]
>So why do you suppose it sometimes takes a long time for people to be >convinced that her name is "K" and not "Kay"? Single-letter names are rare.
>Would you think that things might go any easier if she said, when >first introducing herself to people, "My name is K, that's just with a >K"? That would generally be taken, in my experience, as meaning that her name starts with a K. That would establish that her name was not, say, "Cay" or "Cai", butnot what her name is.
Sincerely,
Gene Wirchenko
Computerese Irregular Verb Conjugation: I have preferences. You have biases. He/She has prejudices.
Solo Thesailor - 31 Oct 2006 23:55 GMT > ... > >So why do you suppose it sometimes takes a long time for people to be > >convinced that her name is "K" and not "Kay"? > > Single-letter names are ... In case bringing the fascinatingfour-letter word into this is distracting, another way to look at it is it (presumably) took a long time for people to be convinced that the earth is round('ish) and it generally takes people a while to be convinced that a close friend or relative has died. It is natural, it is not a fault. I'd imaging if you said "My name is Daniel, spelt as Z-X-Y-U", it would take people a very long time to be convinced. I use extreme examples just to illustrate the point.... and to be funny in my own little way :-)
> >Would you think that things might go any easier if she said, when > >first introducing herself to people, "My name is K, that's just with a [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > her name starts with a K. That would establish that her name was not, > say, "Cay" or "Cai", butnot what her name is. I think what Skitt said: "My name is K -- just the letter K." is just perfect, when there is a need or desire to do that, ie sometimes it is just not important in a quick exchange that is likely to go no further. I would say it with pleasantness and positive feeling (eg of enjoying the uniqueness of the name) rather than bringing up the annoyance of the past or annoyance due to the preconceived reaction or expectation of yet-again questioning. No-one should need to be apologetic or to have to defend how the name is spelt. Those who don't accept your way of spelling your name are just not very socially cluey.
There is a saying that 'communication is the result you get'; and I also think that courteous communication involves caring about the effect on the listener. In all cases goodwill and humour rule, that's me motto... :-)
 Signature Solo Thesailor http://sailingstoriesandtips.blogspot.com
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