Discussion Groups / English Usage / November 2006

White picket fences are a type of cheap fence common in the US.  Here
the phrase represents a typical traditional house in a pleasant, but
probably boring, residential area.  She's saying "I'm not an old-
fashioned girl who just wants to get married and have kids and find a
nice place to raise them -- I tried that lifestyle and didn't like it."

The white picket fence comes as part of a package deal with marriage in
Anglo-Saxon countries. If you want to get married, you first have to
sign an agreement to use it. The newlyweds are handed a bunch of
white-painted wood stakes to plant around their little handkerchief of
a front lawn. A Government inspector visits them periodically to ensure
that the fence is still there and properly maintained, and that the
spouses continue to belong to opposite  sexes.

What gets me, though, is that the lady describes herself as "feisty".
Opinionated, aggressive, quarrelsome and used to getting her way?
Meaning that she offers all the highly desirable features of marriage
without the white picket fence?

What the woman means is she is looking for some fun and not a long
term relationship.  She does not have an eye towards marriage!

The "white picket fence" is shorthand for "a rose covered cottage with
a white picket fence"  which at one time in American pop culture was
the idealized vision of marital bliss.  It signifies the husband
sweeping away his bride to a home of their own where they can raise
children and not be bothered by the cares of the world.

If you watch the Robert Altman movie, "The Player", you will see
Altman's cynical use of that very image at the end of the movie.

There is a pop song from the 1920's, "A Cottage For Sale" that trades
on the same image but with no sense of irony.

BW