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bodega

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tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com - 03 Jan 2004 17:48 GMT
The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
cigarettes. Is it really a wineshop? Does it often have a butchery, or is
that something else?
Tony Cooper - 03 Jan 2004 18:05 GMT
>The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
>with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
>imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
>cigarettes. Is it really a wineshop? Does it often have a butchery, or is
>that something else?

Many of the small, independently-owned, grocery stores in the Hispanic
areas of this town have signs out in front that label them as a
Bodega.  They may sell wine, but wine is not the main product sold.

There are also many stores that use the word "Botanica" in their
signage.  They seem to sell religious items and herbal remedies.
R F - 03 Jan 2004 18:20 GMT
> >The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
> >with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> areas of this town have signs out in front that label them as a
> Bodega.  They may sell wine, but wine is not the main product sold.

"This town"?  Coop, I'm confused -- I thought you said you lived in an
unincorporated area!  (Are there really bodegas near that golf course of
yours?)
Skitt - 03 Jan 2004 22:00 GMT
>>> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store,
>>> sometimes combined with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> unincorporated area!  (Are there really bodegas near that golf course
> of yours?)

You should see what malls and businesses Merritt Island, the unincorporated
Florida area I used to live in, has.  It is more of a city than the
surrounding incorporated cities of Cocoa, Cocoa Beach, and Cape Canaveral
can claim to be.  The difference is merely in the lack of incorporation, for
one reason or another.
Signature

Skitt (in Hayward, California)
www.geocities.com/opus731/

Jonathan Miller - 05 Jan 2004 02:13 GMT
> >>> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store,
> >>> sometimes combined with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic
[quoted text clipped - 16 lines]
> can claim to be.  The difference is merely in the lack of incorporation, for
> one reason or another.

Taxes and/or zoning.  Gubmint regalation.

Jon Miller
Sara Moffat Lorimer - 03 Jan 2004 18:08 GMT
> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
> with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
> imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
> cigarettes.

That's what a bodega is in New York City. (R.F. will be along shortly to
add details.)

> Is it really a wineshop? Does it often have a butchery, or is
> that something else?

What are these things you call "wineshop" and "butchery"? It wouldn't
sell wine and it wouldn't employ a butcher, but it would sell beer and
it might have a deli counter.

Signature

SML

ess el five six zero at columbia dot edu  <http://pirate-women.com>

Lars Eighner - 03 Jan 2004 18:32 GMT
In our last episode,
<1g6zlmw.1v1ueqiu14jmoN%sl560_delete_this_@columbia.edu>,
the lovely and talented Sara Moffat Lorimer
broadcast on alt.usage.english:

>> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
>> with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
>> imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
>> cigarettes.

> That's what a bodega is in New York City. (R.F. will be along shortly to
> add details.)

Does that differ in any significant way from a New York "candy store"?

Signature

Lars Eighner -finger for geek code-  eighner@io.com http://www.io.com/~eighner/
There is a set of religious, or rather moral, writings which teach that virtue
is the certain road to happiness, and vice to misery in this world. A very
 wholesome and comfortable doctrine, and to which we have but one objection,
              namely, that it is not true.  --Henry Fielding

R F - 03 Jan 2004 18:51 GMT
> In our last episode,
> <1g6zlmw.1v1ueqiu14jmoN%sl560_delete_this_@columbia.edu>,
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
>
> Does that differ in any significant way from a New York "candy store"?

The categories overlap.
Gary Vellenzer - 03 Jan 2004 19:27 GMT
> In our last episode,
> <1g6zlmw.1v1ueqiu14jmoN%sl560_delete_this_@columbia.edu>,
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
>
> Does that differ in any significant way from a New York "candy store"?

Candy stores are extinct. We have delis and Koreans, except in Spanish-
speaking areas. Tnere we have bodegas.

Gary
Frances Kemmish - 03 Jan 2004 18:40 GMT
>>The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
>>with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> sell wine and it wouldn't employ a butcher, but it would sell beer and
> it might have a deli counter.

I first met the word "bodega" in London, in 1973. It was the name of a
pub down the street from where I worked. I looked up the word, and it
meant something like " place where wine is matured". I thought it had
something to do with the production of sherry.

The NYC usage - meaning a little grocery store - was quite new to me.

Signature

Frances Kemmish
Production Manager
East Coast Youth Ballet
www.byramartscenter.com

Laura F Spira - 03 Jan 2004 18:25 GMT
> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
> with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
> imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
> cigarettes. Is it really a wineshop? Does it often have a butchery, or is
> that something else?

In Jerez, a bodega is where sherry is manufactured and stored. I spent
several happy days there last year touring the bodegas. The admission
fee pays for a guided tour and a sampling session. The smell alone is
intoxicating and some of the buildings are very pretty.

Signature

Laura
(emulate St. George for email)

david56 - 03 Jan 2004 18:55 GMT
tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com spake thus:

> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
> with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've never seen one - I
> imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which also sells beer and
> cigarettes. Is it really a wineshop? Does it often have a butchery, or is
> that something else?

In Catalan Spain, a bodega is a wine shop (at least I've never
noticed them selling anything other than alcohol).

Signature

David
=====

Javi - 03 Jan 2004 18:59 GMT
tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com  escribió :

> The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes
> combined with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'. I've
> never seen one - I imagine a Mom and Pop grocery on the corner which
> also sells beer and cigarettes. Is it really a wineshop?

It depends on where the bodega is located. In some Hispanic countries, as
Colombia, Venezuela and others in tropical areas, wine is expensive (it has
to be imported), so I think that, there, other alcoholic beverages, mainly
rum, are sold in bodegas, but not wine. I gues that in the USA, due to its
laws about selling alcoholic beverages, wine is not sold in bodegas.

> Does it
> often have a butchery, or is that something else?

Not often. Meat is usually sold in "carnicerías" ("carnecerías",
"carnerías", and probably other similar words derived from "carne", that is,
"meat").

In Spain, "bodega" can be either "wine cellar", "wine shop", "wine bar" or
"hold" (of a ship or airplane), but never "grocery".

The word comes from Greek "apotheka", from which French "boutique" (shop),
Catalonian "botiga" (grocery), and very probably the meaning of "bodega" in
Hispanic America is due to Catalonian influence.

Signature

Saludos cordiales
                         Javi

Mood conjugation:

I am an artist
You are a Bohemian
He forgot to shave this morning

(Craig Brown)

John Estill - 03 Jan 2004 21:21 GMT
I just came across this message from "Javi"
<poziyoNOSPAM@hotmail.com>, which has been sitting on
alt.usage.english since Sat, 3 Jan 2004 19:59:36 +0100.

>tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com  escribió :
>
[quoted text clipped - 22 lines]
>Catalonian "botiga" (grocery), and very probably the meaning of "bodega" in
>Hispanic America is due to Catalonian influence.

I looked up "bodega" in the Royal Academy's Dictionary just before
finding Javi's post, which it confirms.  The first several meanings
have to do with wine maturing, storage, and sale; the remainder
obviously derive from that.

My Spanish is mostly Mexican; "bodega" isn't much used there, and my
impression of its meaning (I never had a reason before to look it up)
was something like "warehouse or store".

I'm charmed by the derivation from "apotheka".

Regards,
John
Signature

John Estill
Millersburg, Ohio  USA

Tony Cooper - 03 Jan 2004 23:43 GMT
>It depends on where the bodega is located. In some Hispanic countries, as
>Colombia, Venezuela and others in tropical areas, wine is expensive (it has
>to be imported), so I think that, there, other alcoholic beverages, mainly
>rum, are sold in bodegas, but not wine. I gues that in the USA, due to its
>laws about selling alcoholic beverages, wine is not sold in bodegas.

You will learn, as you continue to have contact with Americans, that
it is never safe to say never.  The bodegas in the towns near my
unincorporated areas sell wine if they sell beer, and most do.  A
retail license  to sell alcoholic beverages is good (in this area) for
both wine and beer.
Jonathan Miller - 05 Jan 2004 02:27 GMT
> >It depends on where the bodega is located. In some Hispanic countries, as
> >Colombia, Venezuela and others in tropical areas, wine is expensive (it has
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
> retail license  to sell alcoholic beverages is good (in this area) for
> both wine and beer.

And just to make things interesting, Tennessee makes a distinction based on
alcohol content.  Grocery stores are allowed to sell beer (they have a beer
license), except for that which has a high enough alcohol content to require
a liquor license (which covers wine and distilled spirits).

It is also illegal to sell alcohol within 100 feet of a church, except in
the Nashville Arena, which is only 85 feet from a church.  Ain't politics
fun?

More fun is that Jack Daniel's Tennessee Whiskey is distilled in a dry (no
alcohol sales whatever) county.  I don't know how many of those there are
left in the whole country, let alone the state.

It is my belief that Illinois and Indiana have just one license for all
alcoholic beverages (package liquor, see below).

Also, there is a distinction (I am willing to hazard a guess in all
jurisdictions) between that sold to be taken away ("package liquor") and
that to be consumed on the premises ("serving permit"? or "by the drink").

Hmm.  Apparently 306 cheeses destroys unity (DeGaulle quote, I may
misremember the number), but the same number (at least!) of different liquor
laws leaves us just one big happy melting pot of homogeneity.

Jon Miller
Mike Lyle - 05 Jan 2004 12:35 GMT
[...]
> Also, there is a distinction (I am willing to hazard a guess in all
> jurisdictions) between that sold to be taken away ("package liquor") and
> that to be consumed on the premises ("serving permit"? or "by the drink").

[...]

In UK there's a clear distinction between an "off" licence and an "on"
one. Pubs usually (maybe always) have a licence to sell "for
consumption on or off the premises", and should have lower prices for
"off sales".

A shop restricted to off sales is usually called an "off-licence"
(stress on the "off"), often abbreviated to "offie". Scottish practice
and language varies in detail from that of England and Wales, I think.

Mike.
Javi - 05 Jan 2004 10:25 GMT
Tony Cooper  escribió :

>> It depends on where the bodega is located. In some Hispanic
>> countries, as Colombia, Venezuela and others in tropical areas, wine
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> You will learn, as you continue to have contact with Americans, that
> it is never safe to say never.

Sorry, I meant "usually", but I forgot to write it. Anyway, I did not write
"never".

>  The bodegas in the towns near my
> unincorporated areas sell wine if they sell beer, and most do.  A
> retail license  to sell alcoholic beverages is good (in this area) for
> both wine and beer.

I believed that a  license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain
beer was expensive and not easy to get, and that it required a different
room, detached from the room where food is sold. I see that I was wrong.

Signature

Saludos cordiales
                         Javi

Mood conjugation:

I am an artist
You are a Bohemian
He forgot to shave this morning

(Craig Brown)

Raymond S. Wise - 05 Jan 2004 14:47 GMT
> Tony Cooper  escribió :
>
[quoted text clipped - 19 lines]
> beer was expensive and not easy to get, and that it required a different
> room, detached from the room where food is sold. I see that I was wrong.

In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
requires not just a different room from the room where food is sold, but a
different *outside* entrance. It must be relatively rarely done, because
I've seen only two businesses here which do it.

Signature

Raymond S. Wise
Minneapolis, Minnesota USA

E-mail: mplsray @ yahoo . com

Richard Maurer - 05 Jan 2004 16:52 GMT
<< [Raymond S. Wise]
In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
requires not just a different room from the room where food is sold, but a
different *outside* entrance. It must be relatively rarely done, because
I've seen only two businesses here which do it.
[end quote] >>

Can you go from one room to the other while staying inside?

--                       ---------------------------------------------
Richard Maurer              To reply, remove half
Sunnyvale, California       of a homonym of a synonym for also.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Raymond S. Wise - 06 Jan 2004 08:06 GMT
> << [Raymond S. Wise]
> In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
>
> Can you go from one room to the other while staying inside?

No.

Signature

Raymond S. Wise
Minneapolis, Minnesota USA

E-mail: mplsray @ yahoo . com

Mike Lyle - 05 Jan 2004 19:26 GMT
[...]
> In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
> requires not just a different room from the room where food is sold, but a
> different *outside* entrance. It must be relatively rarely done, because
> I've seen only two businesses here which do it.

Another memory triggered! Many English pubs used to have a separate
door marked "Jug and Bottle" (and I imagine many still do): this led
to a tiny apartment where you could get your own container filled, at
the "off" price, with the local wallop. Local wallop is, of course,
largely a thing of the past now that we have become inured to the idea
of paying transport costs for a product consisting mainly of water:
another supermarket-type case of the unnaturally low price of
petroleum products.

(I sometimes wonder if the Volstead Act might not actually have stuck
if it had allowed beer. In earlier generations rural Englishmen and
Welshmen never touched anything but beer or cider, and most still
don't drink spirits as a matter of course. It's not long since
drinking "shorts" was regarded as unmanly.)

Mike.
Bob Martin - 05 Jan 2004 19:45 GMT
> [...]
>
[quoted text clipped - 11 lines]
> another supermarket-type case of the unnaturally low price of
> petroleum products.

My local 40 years ago had a door marked "off-licence" which led to a
little room not much larger than a cupboard with a counter where one
could buy bottles etc.  There was no way to get from this room to any of
the bars.  I think this was fairly general.

Bob Martin
John Varela - 05 Jan 2004 20:53 GMT
> > Another memory triggered! Many English pubs used to have a separate
> > door marked "Jug and Bottle" (and I imagine many still do): this led
[quoted text clipped - 11 lines]
>
> Bob Martin

Somewhere that I lived, I think it was New Jersey, issued licenses for ON and
OFF premises sales.  A shop might have a sign that said "ABC ON AND OFF",
meaning "Alcoholic Beverage Control Board license for on and off premises".

Signature

John Varela
(Trade "OLD" lamps for "NEW" for email.)
I apologize for munging the address but the spam is too much.

Jonathan Miller - 06 Jan 2004 07:25 GMT
> [...]
> > In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
[quoted text clipped - 6 lines]
> to a tiny apartment where you could get your own container filled, at
> the "off" price, with the local wallop.

Tennessee must still have a similar law, because you have to go to the
brewhouse to get your growler filled.  You can enter from the restaurant,
but you must leave without going through the restaurant.

> Local wallop is, of course,
> largely a thing of the past now that we have become inured to the idea
> of paying transport costs for a product consisting mainly of water:
> another supermarket-type case of the unnaturally low price of
> petroleum products.

Brew pubs are springing up all over the place.  Enough to get states without
them to change their laws to allow them.  Not enough to affect the price of
Anheuser-Busch stock.

Jon Miller
JFK - 21 Jan 2004 19:08 GMT
> [...]
> > In Minnesota, a license to sell alcoholic beverages stronger than plain beer
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
>
> Another memory triggered! ...

Just walking into some of these bars can be indeed funny. Not too long
ago I saw this lunatic British girl with her chubby mamacita date, and
she thought that I am after her lover   …

Everybody was watching her as she was losing her sanity. I think she
was too drunk.  It was so fun watching her rude and some how silly
behavior in  the bar.....
Jonathan Miller - 06 Jan 2004 07:18 GMT
> > Tony Cooper  escribió :
> >
[quoted text clipped - 25 lines]
> different *outside* entrance. It must be relatively rarely done, because
> I've seen only two businesses here which do it.

Takeaway.  Lots of restaurants serve.  Practically everything.  Plus, lots
of taverns sell food.

I know.  I saw "Fargo".

Jon Miller
Carmen L. Abruzzi - 05 Jan 2004 15:33 GMT
Once upon a 1/5/04 2:25 AM, in the land of
btbdl3$5539v$1@ID-177688.news.uni-berlin.de, the very good"Javi" from
<poziyoNOSPAM@hotmail.com> wrote:

> Tony Cooper  escribió :
>
[quoted text clipped - 19 lines]
> beer was expensive and not easy to get, and that it required a different
> room, detached from the room where food is sold. I see that I was wrong.

It varies by state.  Alcohol sales, like most things, are regulated by the
state governments not the national government.
John Varela - 05 Jan 2004 20:45 GMT
> It varies by state.  Alcohol sales, like most things, are regulated by the
> state governments not the national government.

And even county governments.  The example of a dry county has been mentioned
already.  Montgomery County, Maryland, has county liquor stores.  

In the Commonwealth of Virginia, distilled spirits are sold only in State
Liquor Stores.  Beer and wine, including fortified wines, are sold in
drugstores, supermarkets, and specialty shops.

Signature

John Varela
(Trade "OLD" lamps for "NEW" for email.)
I apologize for munging the address but the spam is too much.

Carmen L. Abruzzi - 06 Jan 2004 02:36 GMT
Once upon a 1/5/04 12:45 PM, in the land of
ZKRm3c4Ddl7U-pn2-Jfjkwkipt8bM@dialup-171.75.33.19.Dial1.Washington1.Level3.n

>> It varies by state.  Alcohol sales, like most things, are regulated by the
>> state governments not the national government.
[quoted text clipped - 5 lines]
> Liquor Stores.  Beer and wine, including fortified wines, are sold in
> drugstores, supermarkets, and specialty shops.

In the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, even wine is limited to state stores,
which were called "State Stores".  They used to be pretty shady looking
establishments, a brick facade with narrow little windows above eye level so
you couldn't look in while passing by.  Once inside, there was a bare lobby
area in front of a counter, which ran the full width of the building, so
there was no chance of someone dashing around behind it.  All the bottles
were in the back room well behind the counter.  You had to ask the man
behind the counter to go get whatever you wanted, and he'd go back among the
shelves and fetch it.  There was a little catalog to let you know what was
available.  

It seems they now have self-serve "Wine and Spirits Shoppes", but it's all
still under the control of the state government.

Here in California, every corner grocery sells beer and wine and every
supermarket has two or three aisles of alcoholic beverages.
R F - 06 Jan 2004 02:56 GMT
> Here in California, every corner grocery sells beer and wine and every
> supermarket has two or three aisles of alcoholic beverages.

You have corners?
Carmen L. Abruzzi - 06 Jan 2004 09:05 GMT
Once upon a 1/5/04 6:56 PM, in the land of
Pine.GSO.4.53.0401052155570.14312@alumni.wesleyan.edu, the very good "R F"
from <rfontana@alumni.wesleyan.edu> wrote:

>> Here in California, every corner grocery sells beer and wine and every
>> supermarket has two or three aisles of alcoholic beverages.
>
> You have corners?

We got corners, we got squares, we got long, straight for miles streets
called Market and Mission and Broadway, at least until you get over Castro
and start up towards Twin Peaks, where you get a view down Market you just
wouldn't believe.  I think I left something up there.

But it doesn't end in the city.  Belmont, Redwood City, Menlo Park and Palo
Alto have corners, too.  Hell, even Cupertino has corners, but no groceries,
unless they're, like, Whole Natural Organic Vegan Groceries.

This reminds me; 4 AM New Year's Day while I await the arrival of the
free-for-the-night Muni bus, some guy half drunk at the corner of Mission
and 2nd yells out to me across the street, "Hey, is this Eddy? Is this
Eddy?" I sent him across Market.  Hope he found what he was looking for.
Anna Skipka - 06 Jan 2004 19:12 GMT
> Once upon a 1/5/04 6:56 PM, in the land of
> Pine.GSO.4.53.0401052155570.14312@alumni.wesleyan.edu, the very good "R F"
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> >
> > You have corners?

In California we have corners, coroners, cornices, even porters who've
cornered corn. You should come out and see sometime....

> We got corners, we got squares, we got long, straight for miles streets
> called Market and Mission and Broadway, at least until you get over Castro
> and start up towards Twin Peaks, where you get a view down Market you just
> wouldn't believe.  I think I left something up there.

Youthful illusions, perchance? Last time I was up there I found some
discarded in the parking lot.

> But it doesn't end in the city.  Belmont, Redwood City, Menlo Park and Palo
> Alto have corners, too.  Hell, even Cupertino has corners, but no groceries,
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> and 2nd yells out to me across the street, "Hey, is this Eddy? Is this
> Eddy?" I sent him across Market.  Hope he found what he was looking for.

Eddy typically hangs out between Ellis and the Turk. Rum company.

-skipka
Mike Lyle - 06 Jan 2004 19:21 GMT
[...]
>  the free-for-the-night Muni bus, [...]

Goddamned Communists!

Mike.
ysmirnoff@yaNOSPAMhoo.com - 06 Jan 2004 20:05 GMT
>>  the free-for-the-night Muni bus, [...]

> Goddamned Communists!

In Russia you do not drive bus, bus drives you!
John Varela - 06 Jan 2004 21:39 GMT
> Once upon a 1/5/04 12:45 PM, in the land of
> ZKRm3c4Ddl7U-pn2-Jfjkwkipt8bM@dialup-171.75.33.19.Dial1.Washington1.Level3.n

> > In the Commonwealth of Virginia, distilled spirits are sold only in State
> > Liquor Stores.  Beer and wine, including fortified wines, are sold in
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
> shelves and fetch it.  There was a little catalog to let you know what was
> available.

Forty years ago the Virginia state liquor stores were worse.  You entered a
bare room with a window in the far wall.  All the bottles were behind the
wall.  And if they didn't stock what you wanted, they would order it for you
but only a full case, as I discovered when I wanted to buy one bottle of
Chartreuse.

> It seems they now have self-serve "Wine and Spirits Shoppes", but it's all
> still under the control of the state government.

Same in Virginia, but our local store still has the glass bricks in the
facade.

Signature

John Varela
(Trade "OLD" lamps for "NEW" for email.)
I apologize for munging the address but the spam is too much.

Adam Maass - 04 Jan 2004 01:03 GMT
> tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com  escribió :
>
[quoted text clipped - 22 lines]
> Catalonian "botiga" (grocery), and very probably the meaning of "bodega" in
> Hispanic America is due to Catalonian influence.

For what it's worth, "bodega" is a completely foreign concept in San
Francisco. Some stores use the word in their names, but it isn't a general
term.

Generally, we have "corner markets" and "liquor stores." Corner markets are
mini super-markets (a wide variety of commonly used grocery items -- often
in small quantities), and usually carry a small selection of alcoholic
beverages. Liquor stores specialize in alcoholic beverages (and may have
rows and rows of them) but also carry other items as well. There's a fair
amount of overlap.

There are also produce markets -- they carry a wide variety of fresh fruits
and vegetables, and sometimes other items as well.

-- Adam Maass
Andy Dingley - 06 Jan 2004 01:08 GMT
>The dictionary defines 'bodega' as 'a small grocery store, sometimes combined
>with a wineshop, in certain Hispanic communities'

A confession:

Just before Xmas, I was shopping in Safeways, the wine shelves to be
precise.  Look, I'm unemployed and skint, and I know it's pikey, but
Safeways is nearby.  I wandered the shelves aimlessly, looking for
anything a little better than Blue Nun.

Also shopping here were a local couple (you could tell by the his' 'n
her's shellsuits). I think it was a Xmas treat for them, a bottle of
wine instead of the usual tramshed lager and alcopops. They stopped by
one bottle in particular, I'd already noticed its large and rather
showy label myself - "Bodegas del Pape", with a large triple crown
above it.

"Ere", quoth Waynetta, "wozzat thern?  Bowdagos dell Papa ?"

Possessed by a surfeit of Xmas cheer, or else some left-over Halloween
devilment, I offered an explanation. "Pape" was the Pope, hence the
papal crown. And bodegas were...

At this point I explained a little known (outside Usenet) piece of
papal (and probably apocryphal) history. Except that instead of
explaining "bodega" as a winery, I told the story of Pope Joan. The
female Pope, the horseback childbirth during an Easter parade, the
gynophobic terror of the Roman Catholic church, and the measures taken
to ensure such a thing never happens again, right down to the
"ventilated" chair and the groping of the papal bodegas by a novice
nun.

And they listened, wide-eyed and spell-bound, to every lying word of
it.....
tomcatpolka@yaNOSPAMhoo.com - 06 Jan 2004 02:43 GMT
> And they listened, wide-eyed and spell-bound, to every lying word of
> it.....

Truly a Christmas story to melt the heart of Jack Frost hisself!
R H Draney - 06 Jan 2004 06:59 GMT
Andy Dingley filted:

>At this point I explained a little known (outside Usenet) piece of
>papal (and probably apocryphal) history. Except that instead of
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
>And they listened, wide-eyed and spell-bound, to every lying word of
>it.....

...and everyone agreed it was the best Christmas *ever*....r
 
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