Discussion Groups / English Usage / February 2010

That reminds me of the time I complained to the post office how
inconvenient their new system of selecting which outlet to leave my
parcels was, since there were other, closer outlets than the one they
selected. They explained how carefully they chose the locations of the
postal outlets to ensure that all residents in my neighbourhood had one
in the most convenient location possible - thereby ignoring my main point.

It must be one of those things that varies regionally. I think a lot of
funeral customs do. I would never expect to give such a donation
directly to the family and certainly not to the funeral director,
although there's usually some envelopes for the selected charity at the
funeral home if the family has a wake or reception there (whatever
they're calling those these days; my instinct is to use 'wake', but I
think that usage is becoming old-fashioned).

The family gets a list of donors, I think without the amounts in at
least some cases, and you often get a thank-you note from them as well
as the charity.

What really requires utmost tact and care locally is when money is given
for funeral expenses or for the aid of the survivors. They can't make an
appeal (they're usually stunned with shock and grief, and might have
objections to accepting charity in any case), nor can anyone tactlessly
intrude on them right at the moment of loss. Ideally, a friend or
relative will let the need be known and set up collection and
distribution arrangements in a manner that both gets the money to the
desired target in a timely manner and ensures that none of it gets lost
or mis-spent en route. There have been quite unseemly disputes about the
amount spent on various items and the length of time it takes for the
survivors of a fatal fire to actually get any money in such cases.

Ditto. This is typical wording locally:

   Family flowers only please. Donations in lieu, if desired, to
   Alzheimer's Society, c/o John Gray & Co. Funeral Directors, ...
http://www.belfasttelegraphclassified.co.uk/advert/FD2-100688622/MEHARG-MARY-JAN
E-MAUREEN

If responding to such a request I would write a cheque payable to the
Alzheimer's Society and send it to the Funeral Director with a note
indicating in whose memory it is being given. The Funeral Director would
then after a few weeks bundle all the cheques together with a covering
letter and send then to the charity.

I think the only ones who do anything like that around here are the
scouts. The boys collect canned food and the girls personal care items.

Brian

Same here - it's worth knowing that many of them are not charities.  If
you scrutinise the note carefully, it's possible to check whether they
quote a charity number or make any reference to the Charity Commission.

We take our unwanted clothes, books, etc, to a local cancer charity's
shop, so we have no wish for these plastic bags.  But since we are
rarely at home when they return, they don't get the bags back.

I'm with you, Mike -- sort of. For me, a phone call from a charity that
offers to pick up merchandise one wishes to give away is often welcome,
especially when the items require a truck (due to size/weight). Sure,
people could call the charity themselves rather than wait for a call,
but that doesn't always happen. Intentions are forgotten, at least for
the nonce.

However, we usually take our donations directly to the charity -- in our
case, that's the Salvation Army ("SA").

Sidebar: Dare I say it? We also shop there sometimes. Someone said to me
once that we were depriving poor people of the items, but I explained
that the help given by SA to the needy is generally not simply used
merchandise (though it could be, at times); it's often money for food or
other expenses. That money is derived, at least in part, from the sales
of donated items. And in any case, poor people can still shop in any SA
store.

But getting back to organized charities and other groups calling
possible donors at home: I'd prefer they send me something in the mail
(and often say so to callers) -- and my guess is that that would not
cost them any more than paying their phone bills and paying the people
who make the calls. (My guess is that they're not all volunteers.)

Plus: The whole calling-for-dollars industry has become way too
intrusive. We get phone calls all day and up 'til nine or ten PM. (And
they're not all for charities; many are for political donations or
attempts to sell us something.)

The phone thing has gone too far. It's our phone: we bought it; we pay
the phone bill. Said phone is for our convenience, not for the
convenience of all who have (or can get) the number.

I've been planning to write to my Congressional representative and
Senator and see if the prevailing laws covering this matter can be
changed. If not, maybe the home phone will have to go. Then, if we start
getting "please donate" or "please buy" calls on our cell phones, we may
well instigate an uprising of people who are Mad As Hell And Aren't
Going To Take It Anymore.

Maria Conlon, in a MAHAAGTTIA mood

ObAUE:
Regarding the above usage of "anymore":
From Merrian-Webster Online (an American Dictionary)
Main Entry: anymore
Function: adverb
Date: 14th century
1 : any longer  <I was not moving anymore with my feet -- Anaïs Nin>
2 : at the present time : now  <hardly a day passes without rain
anymore>
usage:
Although both "anymore" and "any more" are found in written use, in the
20th century "anymore" is the more common styling.

Here, if you do that once you are on their list and they will call
whenever they have a truck scheduled to tour your neighborhood.
Which is OK, except that there was an article in the newspaper
several years ago identifying which charities -- it turns out mostly
the ones that claim to serve veterans -- deliver the least amount of
money to the intended recipients. I stopped giving to them, but they
still call every few months when their truck is coming by.

I could request that they remove me from the calling list, but for the
most part it's not a significant intrusion.

Brian

Out of curiosity, why  write "we save stuff up" rather than, "we save
up stuff"?

Presumably the ISPCC has not signed up as a "Corporate Partner" of
JustGive. JustGive charges the partners for its services.
https://www.justgive.org/corporate-partners/faq.jsp

   # How much does it cost to partner with JustGive?
   
   Each of JustGive's partnership are customized to meet the needs of
   the client so we do not have a flat rate. Once we know the scope of
   the project we can provide an estimate for licensing and fees.

I could care less.

They don't need to know why.

Wed, 10 Feb 2010 08:34:07 -0800 from Evan Kirshenbaum
<kirshenbaum@hpl.hp.com>:

I was hoping someone would explain how to hang up on the unwelcome
visitors.